Germ Crazy
| Developer: Open Mind | Graphics: |
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| Publisher: Electronic Zoo | Sound: |
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| Year: 1991 | Difficulty: |
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| Genre: Strategy | Lastability: |
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| Number of players: 1 | Rating: |
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The colourful images, with their childlike linework, made me think of a fun variation of Operation, until I stumbled upon a picture of the game box, which hinted at developments that were, to say the least, ominous…
But the real shock came when I encountered the interface! Believe me, I’ve seen my fair share of convoluted button layouts, but I never imagined it was possible to fit so many commands into the limited space of a modest resolution Amiga (or Atari) screen. Then, I made the mistake of clicking on an icon, which caused a block of new, nested icons to pop up. I experienced the same feeling of panic I get when trying to pay for something on Amazon’s website. That’s when I ran for it…
What follows is my interpretation of the manual. It’s about forty pages long, with 14 of them devoted to the storyline (reminiscent of Fantastic Voyage, or for the younger crowd, the third episode of the first season of Rick and Morty).
You play as a “cellular surgeon” in the future. All diseases have been eradicated, except for one, which your little brother has just caught. The pathogen is a mutant Cold Virus, which devours all the organs in the body, finishing with the brain. Life expectancy is three days. That’s the time you have left to find a cure and save your sibling. Just a simple lab assistant job, right? Except you’ve been miniaturised and transplanted into his bloodstream (a minor detail, as the protagonist is never actually shown in the game).
The title presents itself as a microscopic-scale wargame, set within living tissue. You begin by selecting an organ to serve as the theatre of operations, before placing mobile and stationary units in the hopes of containing the virus’s spread.
These “agents” (ranging from ordinary antibodies to military-grade, laser-shooting drones) consume energy, which regenerates when the patient is provided with the food and rest he need (this involves minimising his pain levels through appropriate treatment). This is how you regularly jump from the cellular world to the patient’s room to make sure he’s not lacking anything, monitor his clinical state, or administer a medication that will provide useful effects on the battlefield.
The other crucial resource is money, which is used to fund certain medical procedures, like the machine that artificially keeps the patient alive (when vital organs fail), or for transplants. If funds run low, the manual suggests selling one of the patient’s kidneys on the black market…
And if all else goes awry, there’s always the option to click on the revolver. That’s the only button I immediately understood the use of: shoot your annoying little brother in the head and end the game.
Although I didn’t have the courage to dive in, it’s always a pleasure to uncover these experimental curiosities that explore concepts that would later become established genres (like tower defense in this case).
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